Years and years later, the same elephant, now grown up, is by the same river, having a drink with his giraffe buddy, when the same turtle that bit him on the tail all those years ago wanders up to the river. The elephant rears back a leg and kicks the turtle as hard as he can, sending him flying way off into the jungle.

“Why did you do that?” the giraffe asks.

“When we both were babies, that turtle bit my tail for no reason,” the elephant replied.
“Wow! You must have a good memory!” exclaimed the giraffe.
“Yep!” said the elephant. “I’ve got Turtle-Recall.”

The British submited a dry historical account “The Elephant and the British Empire.”

The French submited a text “The Sensuality of the Elephant — a Personal Account.”

The Germans submited 47 Volumes entitled “An Elementary Introduction to the Foundation of the Science of the Elephant’s Ear.”

The Americans submited an article from “Money” magazine: “Elephants — the Perfect Tax Shelter for the 80s”

Green-Peace submited a counter-entry “Elephants — they’re better than People”

The Russians submited a terse manuscript titled “The superiority of the Soviet Elephant”

And  submited a poem “The Joy and Freedom Brought forth by the Soviet Elephant.”

But the Japanese won with their Promotional Flier “We have no Elephants but wouldn’t you want to buy a Honda instead”

After the fifth day, the white elephant will be used to its daily muffin (with rasins).  The sixth day you climb the tree, bring with you a muffin without rasins.  Drop the muffin as usual.  When the white elephant finds
out that the muffin lacks raisins, it will darken in anger.

And then you catch it the same way as an ordinary grey elephant.

The French book    - The Sex Life of the Elephant
or: 1000 ways to cook Elephant
The English book   - Elephants I have shot on Safari
The Welsh book     - The Elephant and its influence on Welsh language and
culture
or: Oes ysgol tocynnau eleffant llanfairpwll nhadau coeden.
The American book  - How to Make Bigger And Better Elephants
The Japanese book  - How to Make Smaller And Cheaper Elephants
The Greek book     - How to Sell Elephants for a Lot of Money
The Finnish book   - What Do Elephants Think about Finnish People
The German book    - A Short Introduction to Elephants, Vol 1-6.
The Icelandic book - Defrosting an Elephant
The Swiss book     - Switzerland: The Country Through Which Hannibal Went
With His Elephants
The Canadian book  - Elephants: A Federal or State Issue?
The Swedish book   - How to reduce your taxes with an elephant.

What do you give an elephant with diarrhea?
Lots of room!

How do you get two elephants out of the water?
One by one.

How do you get a giraffe into the fridge?
1. Open door.
2. Remove elephant.
3. Insert giraffe.
4. Close door.

How do you know there are *two* elephants in your fridge?
The door won’t close.

How do you know there are *three* elephants in your fridge?
There’ll be one waiting outside in the Mini.

How can you tell that an elephant has been in your fridge?